he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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