Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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