Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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