brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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