when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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