I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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