she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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