I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
