I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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