why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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