So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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