Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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