Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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