Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize