my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
