East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
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