i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
