yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
