Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
