i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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