Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
