When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
