I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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