brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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