Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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