??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I need water and some morals
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
