He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
