Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
