Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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