due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize
