I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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