Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
