ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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