She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
