I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Blood and glitter go together right?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
