Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
The Olympian is in my bed
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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