I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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