Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I need a beard to bite.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
