I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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