Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
