Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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