there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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