The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
