They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
