found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
