so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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