Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
