I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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