Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
