...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
