help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I just want nice things and good sex
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
